This is NOT a pregnancy announcement.
Unfortunately, it’s the opposite. It’s a story about my pregnancy loss. It’s a story about the scariest and most heartbreaking thing that’s ever happened to me in my life – my ectopic pregnancy.
I’ve been wanting to share this for a long time and it may seem like a random time or day of the week to post about it. But, given all the uncertainty in the world right now, it’s as good a time as any other. While I’m nervous to bare my soul like this, it’s therapeutic to get it off my chest and I now feel ready to write about it.
In February of this year, I suffered an ectopic pregnancy, where instead of implanting in the uterus as in a normal pregnancy, the embryo implanted in my right fallopian tube. Ectopic pregnancies are extremely rare. To put it in perspective, this only happens in about 1% of all pregnancies. Since an embryo can’t survive and grow outside of the uterus, my pregnancy was not viable. And because there was a rupture inside my body, I had to have an emergency surgery to remove it. If caught later than we did, my ectopic pregnancy could have resulted in the removal of parts of my reproductive system, hypovolemic shock, or even worse, my death.
Getting Pregnant
Before describing the painful events of my ectopic pregnancy, I want to share a bit about our journey to become pregnant.
While married in 2017, Alex and I consciously decided to delay parenthood until we felt absolutely ready. We understood all the concerns about getting pregnant after our 30s (he is 34 and I am 37). As I shared in my “So, When Are You Going to Have a Baby” post, we accepted that it might not ever happen for us – and that was okay.
So, fast forward to the beginning of 2020, when we both agreed we were ready. It took us 2 months (prior to month 2, I never tracked my cycle or used an ovulation kit, so the first month likely wasn’t timed properly). I know we are very lucky to have gotten pregnant that fast, as many people struggle with fertility.
That month, a press trip was originally going to coincide with my fertile window. By some divine intervention, the dates changed to literally right after my fertile window. So, I was able to very accurately pinpoint when conception occurred!
On Valentine’s Day (ironically, the day I published the baby post), I had some spotting first thing in the a.m. and I figured my period would arrive shortly after. But when I used the bathroom later and my period hadn’t started, I was confused. It later dawned on me to take a pregnancy test, just in case.
I took the test. I waited. About 3 minutes later, a faint line had appeared!
Wait, what?! Am I pregnant? Immediately, I googled what a faint line on a pregnancy test means, and learned I was most likely pregnant because false positives are rare. However, I also learned that a faint line could mean I was pregnant and miscarried without knowing, or there are complications with this pregnancy.
Douglas was the first to know about my pregnancy!
Okay…so, I’m pregnant (but I also might not be). But I think I am, so YAY! I was ecstatic and overjoyed! Since Alex was at work and I wasn’t planning to tell a single soul yet, I giddily confided in Douglas that he was going to be a big brother!
Once Alex knew, it would be our “Triangle of Trust” and that’s how we’d keep it for several weeks.
The Valentine’s Day card I gave Alex, along with the positive pregnancy test and cosmetic box.
I thought it would be cute to put the positive pregnancy test in an empty cosmetic box (as a decoy), wrap it up, and give it to Alex with a card for Valentine’s Day. In the card, part of my message said, “You’re the best dog daddy ever, and I’m sure you’re going to be an amazing real daddy too…hopefully soon!”.
When he got home, I sat him down and gave him the card and ‘gift’. He didn’t immediately catch on, so I spelled it out for him. I am most probably pregnant!
He was excited. But because I explained what a faint line could mean, we decided we’d take another test a few days later before getting too excited. We went out for dinner that night to celebrate anyway and it was pure bliss!
Three days later, another pregnancy test confirmed it with a solid line. WE WERE EXPECTING! The timing couldn’t have been more perfect. I found out on Valentine’s Day and we confirmed the pregnancy on Family Day! I was around 4 weeks and a couple days, and that would have put my due date in late October (a popular time for births in my family – even more perfect!).
Being Pregnant
During pregnancy, it’s like time stood still. I don’t know if it was the excitement or just my monkey mind. But all I could think about was being pregnant! I experienced classic early pregnancy symptoms, like sore/swollen breasts and fatigue. I would drop asleep around 9 p.m. and then wake up at 3 a.m. During those early morning hours, I read as much as I could. I downloaded pregnancy apps, ordered the books, and I think I read every possible article you could read on that stage of pregnancy.
My first doctor’s visit was a day after the second pregnancy test and things were moving along. We booked our dating ultrasound appointment for when I’d be 8 weeks. We filled out the online forms for 2 midwife clinics. I picked up the prenatal vitamins. We stocked our fridge with pregnancy-friendly foods. Alex and I even started a spreadsheet (classic us) to keep track of all the to-dos and milestones.
At 9 weeks we’d get prenatal screening done. At 10 weeks, we’d announce it to our parents (yes, we didn’t even want to tell them until after we knew we had a healthy baby). At 12 weeks, I’d make the announcement on Instagram/my blog, and at 14 weeks, we were planning to have our gender reveal. I marked each week in my calendar (dates that later had to be deleted).
Picture taken at 4.5 weeks. I was planning to take a mirror selfie like this for every week of being pregnant to track my progress.
All the while, there was this other side to my pregnancy – the anxiety-ridden side. I guess the best way to describe how I felt during pregnancy was cautiously optimistic. Why? Well, because of the looming fear of miscarriage from pretty much the outset.
I suppose, because I had heard the stories and knew of the risks, miscarriage was something I always understood to be a real possibility. It had recently happened to one of my best friends. I read the miscarriage stories: Gracie’s miscarriage story and the scare in her second pregnancy, Sasha’s story, and Ashley’s story. I actually read these stories multiple times to really understand what a miscarriage could be like. Mind you, when it actually happens, this doesn’t in any way diminish the horrible and painful impact.
Then, it HAPPENED. The thing I read about and most feared started happening to me. I started spotting on a Saturday. Some spotting is considered normal during the first trimester. But by Sunday, it hadn’t stopped and actually got a bit worse. SOMETHING WAS WRONG. I knew it. I immediately booked an appointment with my family doctor for the following day. After describing what was going on to him, he suggested that I go directly to the ER.
So, at 5.5 weeks pregnant, I went to Mt. Sinai around 2 p.m. on a Monday, without realizing that, several hours, lots of bleeding, a couple ultrasounds, and an emergency surgery later, I’d be leaving around 9 p.m. on the Tuesday…no longer carrying child.
Pregnancy Loss: Ectopic Pregnancy & Salpingostomy
This part of the story is the hardest to write. I feel a huge pit in my stomach and tear up whenever I think about it in detail. It feels like a scary nightmare because of how quickly the events transpired, and even though I’ve effectively put it behind me, it’s always going to be there.
At the hospital, the bleeding intensified, and my pain (which was at 2 when I entered) escalated to about a 6-7 over the course of a few hours. By now, Alex was with me in the waiting room, where we spent hours. When we finally saw an emerg doc, she suspected it could be an ectopic pregnancy because the hCG levels in my blood were below the normal amount, and ordered an ultrasound.
It wasn’t until around 2 a.m. that I had an ultrasound (there was only 1 ultrasound tech covering 3 hospitals). It was my first time having a transvaginal ultrasound and it was one of the worst parts about the whole ordeal. I was in excruciating pain. The tech was deadpan, barely spoke to me, and didn’t reveal anything. After the ultrasound, I had to wait for the results to be examined by a doctor.
More hours waiting, worrying, crying. At some point, I finally fell asleep.
A gynecologist woke me up and explained that it was most likely an ectopic pregnancy. But it couldn’t be confirmed 100% because the amount of free-flowing fluid in my abdomen made it difficult to see anything on the ultrasound. The fluid and blood in my body pointed to a possible rupture of the ectopic pregnancy, which is extremely serious and requires immediate surgery.
Imagine being hit with the news that you could lose anything from your fallopian tube, to the possibility of your whole uterus being removed (they have to tell you all possible scenarios). Best case scenario: opening me up and removing the ectopic pregnancy only (salpingostomy). Worst case scenario: hysterectomy. I googled feverishly. I asked all the questions, like why surgery right now instead of confirming with a second ultrasound? I wanted to believe it was pelvic inflammatory disease or some other complication.
At this point, I have to inform my family (who were on vacation in Trinidad) for the first time by text that, not only am I pregnant, but I’m also probably going to lose the baby because it’s an ectopic pregnancy.
I bawled. “Why me?”, is all I could think about. “Why did this have to happen to me?”. “Why did I have to be that 1%?”
I did get that second ultrasound, btw, which was just as painful as the first. But they couldn’t rule out an ectopic pregnancy, so surgery was confirmed. Thankfully, laparoscopic.
The hours between then and when I had my surgery were a blur. I have no recollection of the surgery because I was put under. I remember being wheeled on a stretcher into a sterile operating room. I think I counted 7 people who were all speaking to each other and to me, as I lay on the table while they attached various things to me. The last memory I have is of the anaesthesiologist covering my nose and mouth and telling me to take deep breaths.
I woke up groggy and agitated, with a pain in my throat from being intubated. I was in a recovery room. Alex came over to me. It was all over.
Apparently, fewer than 50% of women actually experience symptoms of an ectopic pregnancy, like pain or bleeding. So, I consider myself extremely fortunate that the spotting occurred and we caught this early, because this is something I could have died from.
I know that I was in the best hands possible at Mt. Sinai, recognized for being one of the leading hospitals in the world for Obstetrics & Gynaecology. The doctors treated me extremely well, answered all of my questions, and acted quickly to help me. They removed the ectopic pregnancy without having to remove my fallopian tube.
An ectopic pregnancy is just one of those really unfortunate things that can happen. There is nothing we could have done to prevent it. The timing of it was also just a couple weeks before lockdown in Ontario due to COVID-19, which meant I didn’t have to go to the hospital in the middle of a pandemic.
This is how I’ve made sense of my situation. And for all these reasons, I am grateful.
Taken about a week after surgery, while swelling was going down and wounds healing
I recovered well from surgery, left only with 3 small scars as a reminder.
Gradually, I watched, as the signs of pregnancy left my body. My breasts got smaller. The swelling around my abdomen diminished. My hCG levels returned to 0. Until it was just me, Alex, and Douglas again – our Triangle of Trust. Maybe one day our triangle will become a square, and maybe it won’t.
This year, I watched on Instagram as it felt like EVERYBODY announced they were expecting. As of the date of writing this post, I would have been 22 weeks and 5 days pregnant.
I share this story for anyone who might have gone through an ectopic pregnancy or might have experienced pregnancy loss. You are not alone. You should not feel ashamed, defective, or any less worthy of love and respect.
I am doing much better than I was a few months ago, and what’s helped me pull through is leaning on the words that I previously wrote in this post:
I am happy with and love myself. I know that I am not any less of a woman if I don’t have a baby.
I know that my identity as a woman isn’t defined by whether or not I become a mother.
I am a woman, a wife, a daughter, a sister, an aunt, and a dog mom (and that’s already a lot of roles to handle!).
I may never end up having a pregnancy announcement of my own to share, which is sad on the one hand, but on the other, it’s really okay too.
I cried while reading this. I’ve been married for overtover years and all I can think about is having a baby. Unfortunately luck hasn’t been on our side yet and I’m slowly coming to terms with an alternative reality. You’re such an inspiring and strong woman. Thank you for writing this. I really hope you’re triangle becomes a square someday.
Right, I just came out of an emergency surgery to remove my etopic pregnancy and it was 9 weeks alive pregnancy!! I could’ve lost my life because I contacted & visited hospital due to complication and they returned me home many times saying it’s all hormonal! I lost my right fellopean tube and had massive internal bleeding. I am sorry to hear your tragic loss I am on the same boat . I lost lot of blood and had 4 litres blood transfusions
What were your symptoms at 9 weeks Saminaj?
Funny enough same thing happened to me I was 9weeks pregnant that’s where I founded out I was pregnant and sadly I have ectopic pregnancy worse I did not have any signs of pregnancy and any signs of ectopic I lost my left Fallopian tube this happened lastweek Monday 26 of April 2021 the pain I have right now I thought I am alone in this boat of pain and who experience such pain. This is painful. I am sorry ladies you went through this as well💔.
I’m so sorry to hear about your loss. Sending you lots of love and hugs. To answer your questions, my tube wasn’t removed from the ectopic and to date, there hasn’t been any damage found. Although your left tube was removed, you definitely are still able to get pregnant, if you were hoping to try again. You still have 2 functioning ovaries, and in addition to trying naturally, there are lots of other options. Sorry again and I hope you recover and heal in time.
@samina why dont you file case as medical negligence?
I had the same thing just Monday I was 12 week pregnant. Had the right tube removed 💔💔💔
Same happened with me this year, in total it was my 3 loss.
Hi,
This exact thing happen to me today’s and thank god I went to the ER and thank god I got emergency surgery. Would to the wise- listen to your body . If you are in pain don’t ignore it
I have just read this after having my right fallopian tube removed on the 17th December 2020 due to an ectopic pregnancy. Your post could have been written by me.
Time heals they say xxx
I’m so scared at this moment I’m especially one of those people who fears medical conditions. I took a pregnancy test about a week ago it came out positive and yes also with a fainted line. I had my appointment today. They did a vaginal ultrasound. They told me that they didn’t find anything that it was possible that maybe it was too soon or it can be an ectopic pregnancy. I had no idea what that was but they told me we went through the symptoms. They told me if I ever experience anything related to the symptoms immediately go to ER. Now I’m so terrified I’m clueless of what to do.
Hi Mirella! Thanks for your message. I hope you’re okay. I’m not a doctor and you should always follow your doctor’s recommendations, but I can perhaps suggest a few things – so you can make sure to bring these up/discuss with your doctor. Based on the first day of your last period, how far along are you? I assume you confirmed your pregnancy with a blood test? Has your doctor been monitoring your hCG to ensure it is increasing? Your hCG levels should double approx every 72 hours, and this means your pregnancy is progressing normally. One sign of an ectopic is your hCG level not rising as it should.
If you feel pain or experience spotting, you should go immediately to the ER. Some spotting is normal in early pregnancy, but in my case, my spotting started and didn’t stop and also became heavier (fresh blood as well). If you need someone to talk to, you can DM me on Instagram. My handle is @dineandfash.
Brousing all possible blog posts about ectopic pregnancies while recovering from an emergency operation performed 48 hours ago. Your post helped me a lot. The pain I feel now will hopefully slowly linger out of my body and mind. Right now it is the only thing I can feel or think of.
I’m so sorry to hear about your ectopic. I hope you’re able to recover well and heal from the experience. I’m sure the pain is still extremely fresh, but know that time does help. Sending love <3
I felt that. Those were all my thoughts i had bottle up in my head.. i just experienced my 3rd ectopic. I didnt even know what ectopic was until i experienced my first one in 2019. Im left with no fallopian tubes….. it does get better…. be strong girl
So sorry to hear this. Sending you lots of love. Given how severe and dangerous ectopics can be, so glad this didn’t have a worse outcome for you. Wishing you all the best on your fertility journey!
I went through the same two weeks ago! 😔
I 100% understand your pain. I’ve had three live child births, a miscarriage, and this past August I had a tubal pregnancy which resulted in my left side tube removed. I was bleeding internally, it was traveling up to my lungs. My pain was about the same “2-3” when I went into the hospital and radiated past the scale of “10” I couldn’t lay down at that point I was in screaming pain. I went into ultrasound for a transvaginal ultrasound and I started bleeding there and they were asking me if I was bleeding in general. I said no. I just woke up in excruciating pain . My sister drove me to the hospital, they told me I was bleeding internally. My tube ruptured at the end . I called my husband he left work and got there minutes before they put me under for surgery. I kept telling the nurses and doctors not to kill me I have three little babies at home . I told them my nerves are all over the place and I fear the feeling of being put under. So they gave me what they call a “margarita mix” to keep me calm in which it did and I got put under . I got the three laprascopic scars as well. They went in thru my belly button and both sides. I no longer have my left tube but my husband and I would like to try for one more baby . We are both “26” and no one in my family on my side has ever had an ectopic pregnancy. So this was scary for me. I think I’m more scared of having another and losing my tube or life . But I am working closely with the women center and we are just starting to try since losing our last in August . I pray for baby sprinkles for everyone trying !
I’m so sorry to hear about this. Your experience sounds so scary. I had no idea that it could travel up to your lungs. Thank goodness you caught it when you did and you were okay in the end. Even with one less tube, you can still have a healthy pregnancy and baby. Wishing you the best of luck!
I lost my 6 week old baby and my left Fallopian tube today due to an ectopic pregnancy. The pain is slowly sinking in. I was not planning on having a child but this doesn’t make the situation any less painful. Thank you for sharing your story and to all the women and families going through this, we are the 2% and yet, we are no where close to being alone.
So sorry to hear about this, Grace. Sending you lots of love! We definitely are not alone. No one should ever have to feel that way during or after pregnancy loss <3
I googled ectopic pregnancy blogs because I needed to read someone else’s experience. Feeling so alone and wow 3 years later and I couldn’t even begin to say how close this story is to my experience right now. Found out I was pregnant 2 weeks ago (February) after 2 years of trying with fertility treatments. Finally got my positive.
Then 2 weeks later Feb 21st the bleeding and the pain they told me I would probably get since the ultrasound showed a possible ectopic happened. I rushed to the ER as the pain got worse.
I so had flash backs reading yours since I’m only a week out post surgery. Baby would have been 7 weeks and 2 days.
We counted ahead, we planned, we dreamed.
I remember them telling me the same worries of going under and what the possible worse case scenarios.
Now I’m just here trying to cope. 2 years of trying. 2 chemicals 4 rounds iui. One pregnancy ending in ectopic.
No one prepares you for this.
Sending love and healing.
I am so sorry to hear about your ectopic. Also so sorry you’ve had to endure all that you have in the last few years. Nothing really prepares you for an ectopic and it can be a super traumatic experience. So I hope you’re able to find some healing. Sending you love as well <3
I also had ectopic pregnancy it was like life taking experience for me. We have been trying since long for good news. One day we get the good news we were so happy. But that happiness for not long. At week 7 when i get my ultrasound done. They told me that it is ectopic in right fallopiane tube. They told me to go to hospital immidietly. Doctors gave methodroxate treatment but that did not work and my hcg levels were increasing after getting methodroxate. Then they have to opt for laproscopic and removed my right tube. That was so heartbreaking. I was in trauma. I have never felt this pain in entire life. Physically i have recovered but mentally not. Will try for baby after some time.
I ended a pregnancy for fetus problems, after I had an ectopic pregnancy and few months later another miscarriage. I was so down for so long I can’t recall. But I have a 5 yo daughter that is perfection and now I am expecting twins out the blue. Live r pain and once ready try again.
Hi Thank you so much for your story it brings hope and faith to me, after your ectopic pregnancy you had one Fallopian tube or your ectopic pregnancy did not damage your tube?.
I read this whole blog post word by word and I know I really don’t know how it feels but I can feel from reading how painful and hard this is for you, Alex and I’m sure for Douglas too. You are such a strong person and for sharing this story. I hope for your full recovery soon! Sending you hugs xx
Hi Thank you so much for your story it brings hope and faith to me, after your ectopic pregnancy you had one Fallopian tube or your ectopic pregnancy did not damage your tube?.
I read this post and I’m so sorry you had to go through this . As an obstetrician/gynecologist, we do this everyday and you gave a perfect depiction of how scary and difficult it is being on the other side. Definitely gave me something to think about. The good news, is many many people have full term uncomplicated pregnancies after an ectopic pregnancy. Thanks for sharing, and looking forward to your rainbow baby story ❤️
Thank you for sharing. I had an emergency surgery on Wed for my ectopic pregnancy, after 2 unsuccessful doses of Methotrexate. If I could have known all these, I would have gone through surgery in the first opportunity. My experience with Methotrexate was horrible and painful. My doctor told me about all the risks with the treatment but at that time I didn’t think about pain, I was thinking in my right tube and having hope to not be operated and removed it. Unfortunately, that happened, the doctor removed my right tube and my ectopic pregnancy. I have been in emotional pain because I was so happy with the pregnancy, and as you said Why me?. I am trying to understand and assimilate the situation which could have been worst, so thankful I am alive and I hope to move on sooner. Again thank you for sharing your story. I felt relieved and supported by others than I neither know but we have the same experience in our life. Blessings
Hi @eileen your story is similar to me
Thank you so much for sharing. I feel like this is my story as I can remember all this happening to me in February. I’m so sorry for your loss and everyone’s who’s lost a child or pregnancy. I too this week particularly have had a tough week as I’m still struggling with a lot of anger and hurt. I’m happy that you’re at such a better place now. Thank you.
Thank you for sharing your story, the same thing happened to me in April and I was considered COVID-19 positive during the surgery because my boyfriend had symptoms. We were staying at a family chalet to flee the virus and ended up getting infected from all the hospital visits because I had taken both of the injections for the ectopic pregnancy, which didn’t end up working:( I had already had 2 operations this past year from massive ovarian cysts that seem to also have no explanation, it’s hard to wrap your head around why certain things happen to certain people but I am healthy and happy now which I am so grateful for! And It’s true that it all happens so fast and the pain is terrible, it’s hard for others to understand. Reading stories like yours help me feel less alone! Some days I wish I could go back and erase it all but other days I’m am grateful for the strength it has brought me and my relationship. The thought of trying again scares me, but I know that I am stronger because of my experience and if it happens again I will survive!
Wishing you all the best 🙂
I wanna say you are so brave for telling your story. I am currently in the recovery process from having a laparoscopy surgery (removing my left tube) due to an ectopic pregnancy. Having two miscarriages before this one is very very tough…. Just know you are not alone I’m here with you.. with the same scars …. we will get through this and God has his timing you will have your baby just as I will have mines ❤️ Be strong ❤️❤️
Thanks for sharing. As of 3days ago I had to be given methotrexate as I was told I had an eptopic pregnancy. My husband and I have been trying for months and we were delighted to find out I was pregnant. I have longed for a baby for so long. I took a test on the Monday and by Monday night I was loosing. By the Wednesday I was in pain and come the following Tuesday I was rushed to A&E with severe abdominal pain. I’m on the other side of the whole ordeal however I cant seem to get past the fact that I had to have my pregnancy dissolved and I continue to ask why me! My siblings all have had normal pregnancies, one of which wasn’t planned and I’ve been the unlucky one to experience this. My fear is getting pregnant again and it happening again.
Hi Jocelyn, I’m in a similar situation as you. Your response concerning the ectopic pregnancy was about 9 months ago. Did things change? Have you been able to have a baby? Did you experience any other miscarriages or pregnancy issues after the ectopic?
I hope things for better for you.
Hi Jocelyn. I’m so sorry to hear about your loss. Sending you a big hug. To answer your question, I have not yet been able to get pregnant. My husband and I tried for 6 months to conceive naturally before seeking help from a fertility doctor. We tried 2 IUIs, which were unsuccessful and we are in the process of going through our first IVF cycle. Don’t let your ectopic pregnancy stop you from trying. Remain hopeful. It will happen. And if not naturally, there are lots of options! xo
Also, I’ve been sharing my fertility journey on my Instagram @dineandfash. I’ve shared lots of resources about fertility and I’ve been documenting my IVF cycle in this story highlight: https://www.instagram.com/stories/highlights/17925090013585222/.
Good luck!
Thank you for sharing. This just happened to me over the past few weeks. We have been trying for almost a year to get pregnant. We were SO excited, but just like you trying to be cautious. We have had our close friends miscarry twice. But, we started making our calenders, buying books, and making plans. Unfortunately, at 5 weeks I thought I miscarried. I went to the Dr. Due to intense pain and bloating. Long story short they dismissed me and three days later I ended up in emergency surgery for a ruptured ectopic pregnancy and 2L of blood in my abdomen. I ended up losing my left fallopian tube. It is such a hard thing to go through especially when no one around you has gone through it. My husband doesn’t even fully understand how I am feeling. It is a really lonely feeling. I am tough most of the time, but other times a wave of tears overcomes me. I hate this process.
Please do not give up! MY STORY: I was pregnant last year with fluid in my right Fallopian tube. I originally ended up knowing this because I woke up one morning after having a dream I was pregnant and it seemed so real that I took a real test. Voila it was true. I had no symptoms at all. I was cramping so I decided to go to the hospital. They took a test, confirmed my pregnancy and advised me to come back in 2 days to check my HCG levels to make sure they would continue to rise. 2 days later I went back and my levels dropped drastically. While Of this was going that’s when the bleeding started. Not even 2 days after finding out I was pregnant I was having a miscarriage due to fluid in my right Fallopian tube. I was told I needed surgery, my chances of conceiving naturally were cut by more than 50% and if I wanted to get pregnant in the future I would need to engage in some fertility treatments which are extremely expensive. All I kept hearing was negativity and I became so distraught that I put it in my mind that I would never have a baby, I accepted it and life would have to be that way. Fast forward a full year later: I started feeling sick early morning and all throughout the day for 3 weeks, horrible nausea and tender breasts. Mind you, I always get the symptom with my breasts because that happens a week before my cycle. The part that started confusing me was I was getting tenderness in my breasts it was too early for my cycle and the tenderness felt full not just sore. My boyfriend was actually the one that told me I was pregnant. My first thoughts of becoming sick were not aimed at pregnancy even though I was 14 days late. Reason being because of what I was told a year prior. My body felt different all over. It felt like something was actually going on inside of me. I googled my systems and had every textbook sign of pregnancy but again what was told by the doctor last year made me completely dismiss that theory. I humored my boyfriend and told him to go get a test. I took it and guess what? I was pregnant. I was still hesitant about accepting it or even rejoicing because of what I’d already been through. I called and made an appointment with my OB/GYN. Still skeptical I had doubts. Felt this time it would be tubal! Guess what? Baby is doing fine and where he should be! I know this isn’t your story but I understand your pain all too well and I don’t know what your religious beliefs are but what I can guarantee you is GOD has the final say! He makes the impossible possible and believers out of non-believers! Stay encouraged. A close family member of mine had an exact story like your own and even with one tube. God blessed her with a beautiful, amazing baby currently 4 years old….your time will come hun! Stay positive and hopeful, the rest will fall into place when you least expect.
Thank u for sharing your experience. Whilst reading it I couldn’t help but tear up. It brought back every feeling I felt when I had to endure an ectopic pregnancy with a ruptured fallopian tube resulting in the removal of my left tube. I would have been announcing my pregnancy this month so I know how u feel, along with so many other strong ladies, when we ask the question “why me?” I still have hopes that one day I will have my rainbow baby but until then, I will attempt to live with a mindset of acceptance. Wishing u well and also wishing u too will have your rainbow 🌈 soon.
I appreciate you sharing your story.. I struggle with ptsd anxiety after having my ectopic pregnancy from the hospital that I had been taken to via ambulance. The workers ignored me while in my room at the hospital, heart rate was going so fast my whole body felt like it was turning to stone from the inside out, and all I got was a sarcastic remark from a worker walking by as I cried for help, and ignored 5 times on the nurse button. Pick ups, hang ups… it was horrifying thinking that no one in the hospital actually cared that I could be losing my life in those moments… they eventually gave me heavy anxiety meds via IV, and after not even be able to consciously think, the doctor came in and asked if I was surgery or methotrexate injection (to kill cells.). I couldn’t even think and my boyfriend had to make the choice.. (pretty sure he legally couldn’t and it was bad practice) but luckily he chose well… still here with both tubes after getting the injection and risking the possibility of rupture afterwards.
I SHOULD be so thankful.. However, now I live every day horrified of any pain I’m having, or literally anything going on with my body.
I am so glad that it worked out for you, and wanted to share part of my story with you too. Thank you for your courage in sharing. I hope you stay blessed..
Thank you for sharing your story. I too had this happen recently. For 13 days we didn’t have any answers. I never had any bleeding just severe abdominal pain. Multiple internal ultrasounds couldn’t identify my problem either. 2 days ago I was in so much pain I had to go to the ER. Had I not I too would have died from the amount of bleeding I was experiencing internally. I can’t even cry about it right now and can’t even feel what I want to feel because my insides hurt too much to cry. It was one is the most painful experiences physically and mentally I’ve had to go through. Thank you for sharing your story.
Thank you for sharing. I see myself in your story, with the stocking of the fridge, buying prenatal vitamins and planning everything. Then it happened. Today marks 2 weeks I had the most excruciating pain on my left side, and had to go for an emergency surgery to take out my left tube. And here I am, feeling empty and baffled about what just happened. Not sure if I’m grieving, or just getting over it. Am I guilty somewhere? Just can’t wrap my head around it.
I am 6 days past surgery for etopic lost my left tube but the only difference I can not is I had normal implantation spotting at the time of my missed period and 2 days after I would have been six weeks the day of my sergury I know exactly when it busted and thank u for ur story we r still so broken hubby just went back to work today and it’s the first time I’m left with my other 2 children since then my youngest is 1 1/2 thank u again for sharing as I know how hard it is we tried for 7 months with tracking and have been together 10 years my other 2 aren’t his I didn’t cheat but things happen this was his first bio baby and he is devastated we both r
Although it not something you would like have an common with anyone. I Feel comfort knowing that the feeling i am Feel after my ectopic pregnancy surgery which required my right tube to be removed are normal. So many questions on why Although i have children this baby was so wanted. What did i do wrong can i still have another baby do i want to try i am so scared of the outcome. I have comfort that there has been success pregnancy after an ectopic surgery i am just not sure if my story would.
Hi Tina. I’m so sorry to hear about what happened and thank you for sharing that with me. First thing to know is that it’s not your fault. Ectopic pregnancies are unfortunately sometimes just things that happen and cannot always be explained. If you have one remaining tube left and a healthy uterus and ovaries, you can definitely have children again. I’m not a doctor, so I recommend that you speak with your doctor and/or get a referral to a fertility clinic. You might want to consider getting a tube test (to ensure your remaining tube is not blocked) and sonohysterogram (to ensure your uterus is healthy). Depending on your age, there are other tests that can be done to give you an indication about your fertility.
Same as mine 😷
So sorry to hear about this, Archana. Sending you love and light. I hope you are able to heal and recover from this experience.
Thx for share the story same as mine,on 23 rd middle of night just 9 days past operation ectopic pregnancy(right tubal pregnancy post laparoscopy right salpingectomy, adhesiolysis,and left salpingostomy)i was shock n still Didnt believe Its happen to me🥺😭honestly 2/3 week before i already felt my body strange stomach pain but i just ignored i think Maybe just effect to get period and the end i was i feel so much my stomach pain,Dizzy even cant walk i call 999 ambulans come to send me to the hospital that time im happy when i knew was 1 month pregnant but unfortunately that ectopic pregnancy i got very serious condition n already bleeding inside the doc Said im in danger and urgent so must take action to operation immediately,i felt shock, mind blank, scared, crying, dunno anymore what to do that time even i dunno i’ll life or die 😭 but the doc saved my life and grateful to god still give breath till today,🙏😇❤️from This experience really take serious pay attention to my body always check up if feel unwell bcz I already put my life in danger.hope never gonna happen to me anymore best wishes i still hv chance to get normal pregnancy after been long time wait to having baby 🥺🤲🏻❤️
I am so sorry to hear this…. I just had my right tube and ectopic pregnancy removed this past Saturday. May we heal from this horrible experience.
Sending you lots of love and strength for your recovery, Mim. I’m so sorry for your loss.
I just wanted to say thank you for sharing your story. I have related so much to you as I have just had the same experience two days ago. This was my first ever pregnancy and we got pregnant quickly, but there was never a heartbeat or real embryo just placenta tissue in the wrong place. My right Fallopian tube ruptured and I had emergency surgery. I spent two weeks thinking of how I would announce and planning it just like you did. I hope and pray everyone affected by this goes on to have healthy babies including myself
I’m so sorry to hear this, Ashleigh. Sending you all the love, and hoping you can find the peace and healing you need. If trying again is something you will eventually consider, know that it is possible. <3
Thank you for sharing your story. Your words describe exactly what I’ve felt. I had an ectopic pregnancy last week and had my left tube removed. I was 6.5 weeks pregnant and I had a frozen embryo transfer. The embryo traveled back into my fallopian tube and caused it to burst. Worst experience of my life as we have been struggling with infertility for over 4 years and finally had some short-lived happiness. The physical pain will heal but the emotional pain lasts much much longer.
Hi Sara! I’m so sorry to hear about your ectopic pregnancy and loss. Sending you lots of love. I hope you are able to heal and recover, physically and emotionally. You’re right about the emotional pain lasting much longer. Grief is different for everyone. I hope you are able to find support from your family and friends. I am also happy to chat at any time (you can send me a DM on Instagram, if you have any questions or are feeling alone).
Thank you for sharing your story.
And thank you to the rest of you ladies for sharing.
I just had surgery last Friday, April 9. I too only had the ectopic removed, and in a weird way, I sometimes wish I had the whole tube removed so I wouldn’t have to bother worrying about the ectopic tube. :[
This was definitely the most traumatic incident of my life.
Did you have bleeding/clots after the surgery?
I still have the shoulder pain that alarmed me of the ectopic in the first place, and I’m wondering if that will go away soon.
I will never give up trying to be a mom, and I hope the rest of you keep your faith as well, no matter how hard it can be some days!💛
My story is same ..as i read the whole story i feel these are my words ….. I had right tube removal after ruptured ectopic pregnency ..that was so horrible .now i am on the way of recovery but worry about the future …..all the comments and this story give me strength … I hope all those who suffer with this can have beautiful babies in future including me😊
Hi Ayesha! I’m so sorry to hear about what happened. You’re not alone! Take the time you need to recover and heal from the experience. When you’re ready to try again, know that it is definitely still possible!
I am sorry to hear what happened to you and thank you so much for sharing your story it really healing my soul- on the 26th of April my left Fallopian tube was remove due to Fallopian tube during surgery they did screening for uterus and my right Fallopian tube if both are health and Dr gave me good news due to the pain I felt after so much excitement that finally someone will call me Mama but unfortunately that couldn’t happen-I lost faith and hope but after reading your story and comments I am at ease to accept what happened and move on I do trust in process and to the Lord that he will bless us again as he promised before. So May the Lord heal our broken hearts when time is right and bless us with happiness which is another opportunity to conceive and have healthy pregnancy I still confused what caused ectopic pregnancy in my case I don’t find answers….M hurt a lot but I believe time will heal.
Thanks for inspiring me. I am also a victim of ectopic pregnancy 😭. Had my removed a month ago. We will smile soon. God is giving us double for our pains and lost…
I have noticed that most of the eptopic surgery are done on April month, mine was on 19 April it was 9 week pregnancy. There was no symptom of eptopic untill i was fainted and operation has to be done in emergency. Ultrasound was done before conceiving after 2nd week since period had started but ovum/ egg was not seen in that ultrasound. My right tube was removed. It was 3rd loss and have no babies. still having hope with fear for the future so need to be careful and checkup is required every week until it’s confirmed that baby is growing inside uterus not in the tube.
Sorry about your baby.
I am just a student , and I am 13 years old it was an assignment to learn about ectopic pregnancy, but I am so sorry I hope you will feel better may God be with you Amen
Hi,
So, this happened to me 2 weeks ago. I fainted while out walking my puppy. So was rushed straight to a&e. Were after various tests all was okay, and the announced I was pregnant. Fast forward 4 hours.. my hormone levels were through the roof and I was still in sooooo much pain. I was then told it was possibly an ectopic after not being able to see anything on my ultrasound, but was visible through a camera inside. My little peanut was on my right fallopian tube. My fallopian tube had ruptured causing the blood to pool in my abdomen so they had no other choice but to operate and remove eveything.. including my tube. Its so hard getting by day to day. I’ve had infections in one of the incisions and currently I’ve got a hole in my navel where the stitch hasn’t responded well to healing and it causing it to reject the stitch. I need my life back to normal some how.. but its going to take so much time. Lots of love to all that have lost!!
Xxx
Really sorry to hear about this, Jodie. I hope you’re able to heal physically and emotionally. Having a healthy pregnancy is still very much possible, although you had to have 1 tube removed. Sending you lots of love!
Thank you for sharing your story and to everyone who has shared theirs in the comments. I had emergency surgery yesterday due to an ectopic pregnancy and had to have my right tube fully removed. I only found out I was pregnant the day before by total suprise after going to the doctor with prolonged bleeding and painful bloat. I wasn’t sure I was ready for a baby but now, after knowing I still can still conceive one day, it’s all I want to happen in the near future. What strength we all have – sending love to you all xx
Thank you for share I just went through this yesterday. This was my husband and I 1st pregnancy I was 7weeks my baby was in my left tube. I too had to have emergency surgery. The ultrasound was vey painful I was in tears it hurt so bad. The whole time I was alone until I got in a room because they wasn’t letting anyone in due to COVID. When I finally got a room and my husband was able to come in the room with me and got tge new that the baby die and I had to have surgery like right now or I would die . I felt so sorry him . We both just cried. But we pulled it together for each other. I was so scared like I’m about to have surgery like now . Of course my husband had to leave due to Covid. They took me to the recovery to get ready for surgery the nurses took really good care of me. When I went into the surgery room everything went so fast I remember too people telling me to over to the other table and I felt something go into my iv and the nurse said move fast because your about to go to sleep and I that’s what happened. Then I woke up having to go to the bathroom no pain at all which was amazing. I’m grateful to be alive typing this but I do miss my baby and being pregnant. I will not let this defeat me and we will keep trying for a healthy baby. To those who went through what we did don’t give up. Do not get depressed. Our pregnancy journey isn’t over we all will have healthy babies one day . God bless you all💕
I’m also recovering from this trauma. I had my left tube and overy removed. I really wanted my son to have a sibling, but at age 40 with one overy and one tube I’m not sure that will be the case.
I really didn’t have many symptoms. I basically fainted and was rushed to the ER. I lost 2 liters of blood and had to have a transfusion. I was exactly 8 weeks along.
I just want to heal and get back to feeling normal. We have a puppy coming in 5 days and I haven’t even started with our Christmas holiday decor and gift wrapping, not to mention I’m now 5 days behind at work.
How long did it take for you to feel physically better?
Hi Laura, I’m so sorry to hear about this. Sending you lots of love and strength. If you do hope to try again, just know that it is possible – even with 1 ovary and 1 tube. I recommend that you speak to a fertility specialist right away (your family doctor can refer you). In terms of feeling better, it was only about 2-3 weeks until I physically felt better. That being said, my surgery was laparoscopic and I didn’t have my tube and ovary removed. Emotionally, it took much longer, of course. As much as possible, take it easy during this time and be kind to yourself. Time does heal the physical and emotional wounds. Again, sending you lots of love.
Thank you for sharing! I experienced the same thing April and June of last year 2021. My first ectopic pregnancy my tube ruptured. I’ve never heard of it until then. The second I was numb to the situation. All of these mixed emotions, feeling less then. I found myself blaming myself for everything that was happening. I thought I had a second chance with me having one tube, then to have my other removed. That hurt us the most. My fiancé was my best support during that time and even still now. I know that one day God will bless us with children. The same for you and your husband. Sending you big hugs and lots of love.
So sorry to hear about this happening to you. Just know that it is still possible for you to have children without fallopian tubes. Sending lots of love!
Thank you for sharing your experience! I was pregnant last year had miscarriage at 5months, it took me
Months to conceive which I didn’t even know until I have spotting and pains which we were inform I had ectopic the surgery was done on the 10th of March 2022, I have just one Fallopian tube left. You guys story really motivates me now cus have been mourning ever since the surgery I felt my life s over but now I tink I have have hope and to stay postive
Thank you so much for sharing this. I lost a Fallopian tube and a very much wanted baby along with it a couple of years back. I bottled everything up and moved on with life but now it’s all come bubbling to surface and I’ve realised I need to talk and most importantly but also sadly I’m not alone in this heartbreaking situation. Sending much love to all going through the same thing ❤️